Sunday, July 17, 2011

The First Edition of "Things that make you go hmm..."

What makes you stick out as an out-of-fashion tourist more than anything else? A fanny pack.
Invented around 1985, this fupa pouch conquered many unsuspecting victims.  I'm sorry but there just is no cool way to where one.  People tried wearing them in front, wearing  them in the back, they just don't work.  Unless you carry a gun in it, this look cannot be pulled off.

Now I don't know why this is the first reference I could think of but Weird Al's "White and Nerdy" has a two second clip of a fanny pack.  Incoming a video (a past blast in itself)  Look for the 2:00 mark.
So please, don't do it.  Just don't tell Hulk Hogan that.  Ok brother?

Friday, July 15, 2011

Will you marry me?

Did anyone else propose/get proposed to using a Ring Pop?   I sure did!  This delicious candy ring introduced in 1977 and manufactured by Topps changed my childhood!

To paint the picture, this takes place way back in kindergarten.  I spilt glue on some dumb broad and she pulled me into the closet.  She said to me that if I don't marry her then she would tell on me.  What a bitch! But I obliged.  And there was no other way to do it then bust out the ring pop.  Needless to say I switched schools that year and I never saw her again.  Wife (I think Jessica from Dame School), if your reading this, I miss you dearly.  Love, Husband.

But back to the pop.  It seems like as of late these candy rings are back on the rise.  Nick Cannon renewed his vows to Mariah Carey using one.  Fergie even sports on in her "Fergalicious" videos!  (check ~1:42 on her left hand)

This candy had a little downtime in the late 90s and early 2000s but its back and as tasty as ever!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

The Early Coca-Cola

Why is Coke nostalgic?  Yes we drink Coke now, as it’s part of the fizzy debate between Coke and Pepsi. 
But the Coke we drink today is nowhere near the same as it was upon invention in 1886.

1) Coke originally DID contain ~9mg of cocaine.
The original recipe was Coca leaves and Kola seeds (hence the name).  The Coca leaves contain cocaine.  This remained in the recipe until some expected legal issues arrived in 1903.  To keep the flavor, they continued using “spent” Coca leaves, where the cocaine was extracted. 
2) The “energy” portion of the drink has changed three times in its history.  Originally, coke contained French wine but were forced to make it non-alcoholic.  So then they switched to sugar.  But the pussification of America continued and sugar had to be replaced with corn syrup. 

3) Coke was NEVER GREEN.  I don’t know how many people tried to tell me it was but they are all ass hats.  The bottle was green but never the actual beverage. 

So there you have it.  The Coke we know and love today is merely a shade of its predecessor. 
Check it out!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Time for a Thriller!

The myth, the man, the legend.  This entire post is dedicated to the King of Pop himself, Michael Jackson. 

Although his time in court drew attention from his performance, I still consider him the best entertainer to walk the earth.  There would be no moonwalk without him!  He is the greatest dancer of all time without question (sorry Chris Brown doesn't hit it, I mean cut it) and MJ proved it time and time again.  The infamous crotch grab, the toe stand, the entire thriller skit; your choice my friends.  There's just no denying this man was the king of entertainment.
The turn off factor for most is his behind the scenes act.  Many people consider MJs "perfect 10" to be two 5 year old boys.  I will defend the king til no end.  He was a victim of the media.  PLEASE show me proof that he actually molested children.  All you are doing is depriving us of entertainment.

RIP MJ.  You will be forever missed. 

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

And it commences...

Come on in for a ride through time back into the glory days of our lives.  Memory lane is only a click away!

I figure we should start this voyage off easy with a simple toy that EVERYONE owned or played with at some point in their lives.  

The slinky!

Who knew a seemingly endless set of silver loops could be so entertaining?  I know I've had my fair share of attempts trying to get it to walk down the stairs.  (never succeeded)  Whether it's testing how far this metallic slug could stretch or untangling the mess you just made, this toy goes down in the books as legendary.